Growerism: 2016

Have you ever noticed how some leaves look wet even though it hasn't rained for days?

That's honeydew, sounds magical and lovely ain't it?

Sometimes when you walk through the woods or just under some trees and feel a drop on your face, that's not water. It's honeydew.

What is honeydew?

hah

It's aphid shit.

Now that I got my first sick leave day ever because of one of these dickweeds flying straight in to my eyeball and launching an allergic reaction galore I decided to do an aphid appreciation post.

Obviously this is just karma hitting me back since I've killed millions of aphids and other little shits at work and off from work (Nothing relaxes me more than a little genocide).

Here's for you, aphids

I have killed and I will kill again.

There's going to be insane amounts of aphids this year in Finland so be prepared to be showered by honeydew.

But maybe it's not such a disgusting thing after all

I mean

We've eaten honey for centuries and that's basically

Bee puke

Better just open your mouth and let that delicious sugarcoated shit fall in

Aphid appreciation post

By kauhuniemi

Have you ever noticed how some leaves look wet even though it hasn't rained for days? That's honeydew, sounds magical and lovely ...

So I'm moving to a new apartment quite soon and was emptying all the cabinets and shit and found this picture of my dad from the 80's

Nice ain't it

....

Until you see it.

ENHANCE

I SAID ENHANCE

Rhipsalidopsis...

We meet again

My destiny was written in the stars

We truly belong together

At last

Rhipsalidopsis

The chosen one

Now and forever

Blast from the past

By kauhuniemi

So I'm moving to a new apartment quite soon and was emptying all the cabinets and shit and found this picture of my dad from the 80'...

Easter came and with it came the easter cacti, Rhipsalidopsis.

Being a sensible, and completely normal human being, I bought all five colors we had in stock.

Now I'm just basking in their glorious flower flood

Rhipsalidopsis has softer edges on its leaf/stems than the christmas cactus, Schlumbergera.

Being a jungle cactus it enjoys a little bit more moisture than cacti usually do.

Techincally it's a cactus and an epiphyte at the same time.

These leaf cacti don't have any spikes though.

The secret behind getting it to bloom again is the two-month rest season after blooming.

At that point the watering should be put to minimum and no fertilizers either.

The second rest season should be in November to December, that's when the buds start to develop.

I planted three of the pinkish hues to a same pot and two of the red and orange in their own pot because colors fuk yea!

Rhipsalidopsis doesn't mind being in light shade, it can be placed further away from the window than other plants

Also it doesn't like draft so keeping it away from windows is a good idea anyhow.

Old plant book says it dislikes alcaline soil and wants to lean towards more acidic pot mixture.

I used just regular potting soil so time will tell if they will love it or not.

ADORABLE.

Rhipsalidopsis madness

By kauhuniemi

Easter came and with it came the easter cacti, Rhipsalidopsis. Being a sensible, and completely normal human being, I bought all fi...

Hey it's spring and you know what that means

PLANT UPDATE

This time I whipped out my cock to show you how big my plants actually are

This Spathiphyllum was just a baby the last time I posted it, I'm assuming that by fall it will be double the size it is now

One of my newest additions, Paphiopedilum 'Femma' has awesome color on its' leaves.

My Rhipsalidopsis madness has gotten out of hand, you can read more about it in the next post...

Same as above, but bigger and madder!

Livinstonia keeps farting out a new leaf yearly

Hibiscus looks kind of boring now but I'm planning to make it huge and awesome.

Tiny little Phalaenopsis 'Calimero' coochie coochie coo

The poor Anthurium that I just won't let die

Euphorbia blocking the sun as usual. The number on it was to help my roommate take care of my plants when I was gone. You'll get to read about it soonly.

Phalaenopsis with keiki that I havent planted on it's own pot yet.

Dracaena surculosa is a shame to it's kind. It doesn't know where "up" is. The flagpoles it pushes out every year keep going sideways.

Bougainvillea, the pest-giver has begun to flourish after fucking me up with mites.

My brugmansia and what's left of the dates while I've been trying to kill them all winter.

P.s. fuk u sun

Here we have Schlumbergera if you don't mind getting blinded forever by the sun.

Sophora 'Little baby'. I'll put this out in the summer and see if it becomes any more interesting

Senecino herreianus (haha ANUS) chilling here in a teacup

Tentecle monster Selenicereus anthonyanus (haha ANUS again)

Crassula 'Gollum'. Maybe after ten years I can show some progress.

Monstera 'Swiss cheese' Is kind of one of my favourites now

Planted my Rhapis in to new kick-ass pot and it be fancy

Gave the same treatment to my rubber tree and now it looks legit and freshened up

This Sansevieria 'Black ice' is just awesome. There's no other word for it. Awesome.

Double shot of the Ivy who suffered lot of damage during winter, but is getting better, and Codiaeum that suffered some damage while I was away hence the amount of leaves.

Tiny Ficus keeps being tiny

Ok so the other cissus suffered A LOT of damage while I was gone and I simply decided to replace it with the old Cissus I've had for years but never really taken care of. Also the bigger leaves will look so much better than the tiny ones I had here before.